


Attractive Features

by dean_and_cas_at_the_sea



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Awkward Conversations, First Kiss, Flirting, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Misunderstandings, Oblivious Castiel (Supernatural), Oblivious Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-22
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-14 11:13:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28919613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dean_and_cas_at_the_sea/pseuds/dean_and_cas_at_the_sea
Summary: Cas decides to find out how Dean sees him. Awkward conversations, misunderstandings and kisses ensue.Short excerpt:Dean laughed and averted his eyes before observing him again."This reminds me I’ve never actually seen you without clothes. The one time you were naked you had bees all over you.“Castiel squinted his eyes. Dean’s remarks were getting more peculiar by the second."Would you like to see me naked?“ he asked bluntly, not really expecting any kind of answer from Dean.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 17
Kudos: 177





	Attractive Features

**Author's Note:**

> Russian translation by Deri_Dani available:
> 
> https://ficbook.net/readfic/10346854

Castiel was in love with Dean. He had been in love with this wonderful, caring, brave and sometimes infuriating man for a long time, having finally grasped it in his time as a human. Since the very beginning Dean had been acting different around him, different from he did with other persons. 

For example, on a tranquil Sunday a few months back, Castiel and Dean had researched for a case in the kitchen. Eventually, Dean had cooked pancakes, and had asked Castiel whether he, as the undisputed bee expert, thought there was anything better than letting the taste of honey combined with a small portion of whipped cream linger on one’s tongue. While saying this remark, he had watched Castiel curiously and licked his lips which had carried the most dazzling smile. 

Lately however, their behavior towards each other differed even more. The staring had gotten more intense, and Dean touched him more often, casually most of the time, for example on his shoulders or his back when he walked past him. 

Alternatively, Dean touched his forearm when they were sitting at the table and discussing the latest hunt or musing about more philosophical questions of existence. Since Dean probably thought nothing of his actions, Castiel did not overthink those situations too much. 

Nonetheless, Castiel had been on the verge to yell "Stop it and kiss me!“ on more than one occasion in the past few weeks. Such impulsive reactions resembled Dean’s character better than his own, but maybe he had partly adapted to Dean’s behavior, by now. 

Love, this overwhelming feeling, occupied Castiel’s whole being, made him happy and confused him. So many questions filled his mind over the course of every single day. Most reflections happened at night when the Men of Letters Bunker was quiet, when Sam and Dean slept, and he had too many hours to himself. 

One morning, Castiel was so desperate and confused he sought out Sam for advice. At first, Sam eyed him strangely when Castiel asked him how to find out if someone liked him. Immediately, Sam asked, "So have you met someone special recently?“ whereupon Castiel frowned and shook his head urgently. 

"Not recently although one could argue I am meeting this person every day for the first time. There are so many things I discover which are wonderful.“ 

Apparently, this answer had been amusing of sorts because Sam fell into a fit of laughter. When Castiel wanted to ask him in which regard his remark had been funny, so he could remember this particularity for the future, Sam already cried with laughter. 

Still, Castiel decided he had to find out if Dean felt the same.

***  
After Castiel had fiddled with his coat for another two minutes, he finally entered the kitchen. Dean sat at the table, a cup of coffee in his hand while leaning over an old book. Certainly, it contained many pages. Dean seemed very intrigued in the perusal, now put the coffee a few inches farther to the right, before wetting his finger and turning the page. He smiled a little and wrote down something into his journal. He looked radiant, and Castiel felt completely baffled.

"Hello Dean,“ he greeted him despite his nervousness. With a cough, Dean shut the book and turned his head over his shoulder. 

"Mornin' sunshine, what’re ya up to?“ 

A beautiful smile was painted on his lips, and Dean watched him with this kind and soft expression in his eyes Castiel could never quite place. 

Sam had explained to him that eye contact was important which had encouraged him in his intentions. If there was one thing they did for considerable long periods, it was gazing into each other’s eyes. Castiel took a deep breath, trying to suppress his excitement. 

"Dean, do you think I am attractive?“ he asked.  
Dean choked on his coffee, a reaction Castiel didn’t quite understand.  
"Crap,“ Dean cursed. "I burnt my frigging tongue.“ 

He stuck out his tongue, quite as if to check the potential damage, contorted his face in pain. At that moment in the kitchen, Castiel watched Dean with interest, as he always did, now that he thought about it. Dean lifted his head, flinched briefly as he caught Castiel’s gaze, and rolled his eyes. Why was he angry with such a simple, honest question? What had Castiel done wrong?

"Um, yeah, I- you have a nice body.“  
"Thank you, Dean.“ Castiel nodded in satisfaction. This had gone much better than he could have ever dreamed. Dean found him attractive, and if Sam was correct, this was the first step in taking their relationship to another level. He remembered the list he had made especially for this conversation.

"What do you think is my most attractive feature?“  
Dean’s eyes widened, and he coughed a few times. Was Dean getting sick?  
"Buddy, what kind of questions are those?“ He winced, observed the table for a few seconds and looked back at him again. 

"Could you answer the question please?“ Castiel insisted. "It is important for me.“

Dean let out a long sigh, pinched the bridge of his nose, and pursed his lips for a while, making Castiel believe he would not reply at all. 

Dean opened his mouth, shut it again, opened it, shook his head before rattling, "M’kay. Your, um, thighs are pretty impressive, and your hands are kinda great, but I like your eyes the most. They are stunning. Yeah.“ Now, Dean fixated a point at the kitchen cabinet, and Castiel felt at a loss for words. Hence, he didn’t answer at once, instead, he enjoyed the feeling of knowing and reflected on this ordeal. 

That was more than Castiel could ever have hoped for. Dean liked his appearance, he was obviously not appalled by it. Castiel had always expected it because Dean tended to fall asleep on his shoulder when they watched a movie. Then, he would nuzzle his face in Castiel's neck and murmur some words, most of the time Castiel could only understand "Cas“, and the way he said his name was such a lovely sound. 

Then, there were the times when Castiel returned to Dean and Sam after a longer absence due to his duties. At such occasions, Dean would stare at him even longer than he usually did, and he would lick his lips, seeming flustered if that was the right word. And every time, he made a particularly strange comment, bearing some kind of innuendo. Therefore, Castiel had assumed Dean might find his vessel, his body, appealing, but actually hearing it made him feel excellent.

"Interesting,“ Castiel said firmly, quickly remembering to be grateful for Dean’s honesty. "Thank you again. I will leave you to your research, then.“  
"Yeah whatever.“ Dean smirked, little laughter lines forming next to his eyes. Castiel liked it when Dean laughed, it was always a beautiful sight. 

Castiel turned to leave when Dean called out, "Dammit.“

Castiel looked at Dean again who flared his nostrils before furrowing his forehead. "That supposed to be funny?“ Castiel tilted his head in confusion. He didn’t remember making a joke, therefore, he – again – could not grasp Dean’s implication. He had gotten rather good at understanding Dean’s sarcasm, was even using it himself, but some trains of thought from Dean’s side remained a mystery to him. 

"Why’d you ask me that stuff?“

Oh. Castiel had not anticipated that. He had been fairly certain Dean, who was not fond of these kinds of conversations, would remain silent. "For one, I was interested in your opinion.“

"And secondly? Jeez, Cas, don’t make me force you to tell me.“ Dean winked, and Castiel’s throat felt dry. What did he mean by that?

"That will remain my secret for now.“ That answer had been satisfying, yes, that had sounded plausible, Castiel decided.  
"Okey-dokey. You- um, ya know you can always ask me if you need help with a woman, right?“

Castiel shook his head, and let out a frustrated groan, before remembering that Dean could not know why he was feeling this way. He didn’t want to fight with him, not now, but he also couldn’t be here anymore.  
"Yes, I am aware, but there is no woman,“ Castiel said with sincerity. 

"M’kay, that’s awesome. Um, I mean, not awesome, obviously.“ Dean nodded and clicked his tongue. Castiel hated and liked this sound simultaneously. He hated it in the louder version when Dean was on the verge of getting angry or yelling some snarky remark, but he liked the softer form Dean used when he was a little indecisive. 

Castiel admired Dean’s considerate nature, the way his brain worked because on hunts he always made quick and smart connections between the victims and regarding the clues. Right now, he seemed as if his mind was working continuously, trying to figure something out – or rather trying to find the right words, perhaps. 

After giving Castiel a side glance, Dean touched his chin and watched him contemplatively. 

"Ya know, it’s actually not fair.“ Dean paused and smirked at him, wiggling his eyebrows. Castiel remembered this expression, in fact, he was quite familiar with this manner. He had seen it many times before, but usually, when Dean had been flirting with women or teasing him.  
"Should tell me my features as well.“

Castiel’s breathing came only choppily. Although he understood quite well what Dean had meant, he decided to act surprised.  
"Your features? You mean what I find most attractive about you?“

For a moment, Dean bit his lips in a way that made Castiel’s body tingle, then he looked at him with curiosity in his eyes. "Yeah, that,“ Dean answered hoarsely. To gain more time, Castiel looked at Dean like he was considering his answer thoroughly whereas in fact, he could have told Dean many of his qualities in the fraction of a second.

"That would be also your eyes, although I very much like your lips and back and shoulders, too.“ He had said it out loud, and felt a bit relieved. Not daring to look at Dean for his reaction, he continued talking fast. "Still, you already know you are an attractive man. Many people have told you that,“ Castiel added with perhaps a touch of bitterness in his voice. He hoped Dean would not notice this fact. 

Meanwhile, Castiel had sat down at the table, folding his hands in front of him. Many seconds passed without a single word being said, and Castiel strongly suspected this was not the ideal way this conversation could go. 

Cautiously, Castiel looked up again, immediately confronted with Dean’s gorgeous emerald eyes. Dean watched him intensely, inspected his face like there was something interesting to find there. Undoubtedly, Castiel felt Dean’s gaze on his lips, and he didn’t know what to make of it. 

Dean scratched the back of his neck, then shrugged his shoulders.  
"Well, your opinion always matters to me, especially in that case.“ 

Why? Why would Dean say that? It didn’t make any sense to him. 

Castiel wanted to ask him what he had meant, but Dean was already talking again. "So lips and back, huh?“ Dean laughed and averted his eyes before observing him again. "This reminds me I’ve never actually seen you without clothes. The one time you were naked you had bees all over you.“ 

Castiel squinted his eyes. Dean’s remarks were getting more peculiar by the second.  
"Would you like to see me naked?“ he asked bluntly, not really expecting any kind of answer from Dean. 

Dean coughed again, and Castiel was getting more worried about him. Or maybe Castiel actually made Dean feel so uncomfortable that Dean did not know how to react otherwise. 

Now that Castiel thought about this topic he remembered the times when Dean had scolded him for getting into his personal space before, oddly enough, approaching Castiel even further. This was the same kind of cough, and now Castiel felt bad. Maybe, this had been a horrible idea. 

Castiel heard a growl from Dean, and narrowed his eyes more.  
"I just meant because you always wear the same clothes. Trench coat and all.“

"But you like my clothes, the trench coat in particular.“ Castiel remembered when Dean had returned the coat to him almost solemnly, when Castiel had experienced the memory loss after Leviathan, And he also remembered the way Dean had looked at him after he had returned from Purgatory and cleaned up. 

"How do ya- Yeah, sure I do. But that’s not the point. Never mind, forget about it.“  
"I don’t understand. Why would I forget that?“  
Dean rolled his eyes. "It’s an expression, Cas.“  
"I certainly will not forget this. On the contrary, I wish to continue this conversation.“

Dean smiled a little, inevitably causing Castiel to smile as well. "You do, huh? Why is this topic so important to you anyway?“  
"I’m not sure whether I can tell you.“

Dean made an angry sound, and Castiel’s entire body tensed. "You can tell me anything. I’m your best friend, ain’t I?“  
"Of course, Dean,“ Castiel said and out of reflex laid his hand on Dean’s.  
"M’kay. Still, ya know where to find me if you change your mind,“ Dean mumbled and took another sip of his coffee.

***

Two weeks later, Castiel again felt the urge to ask Dean a question. The reason was a fantasy he had experienced involuntarily. He didn’t know how and why it had happened, but his subconscious had been very vivid. 

Dean and Sam had been on a hunt for a few days, but Dean and him had texted from time to time, they even called each other at nights. Quickly, it had become the best part of his day. Therefore, Castiel called Dean on this day as well. After a few minutes of telling each other about their days, Castiel could not endure his thoughts any longer for he had to continue with his plan. 

"I would like to get your advice and insights on something. Since you’re my best friend.“  
Dean laughed at that, it was his warm laugh which rumbled in his chest and sounded so carefree. "I’m all ears, pal.“

"I had an interesting fantasy during my meditation. You could perhaps call it a dream, although I don’t sleep. And I found myself thinking about kissing today.“ 

Dean remained silent, didn’t laugh, Castiel could only hear his somewhat rapid breathing.  
"A sex dream?“ he blurted. 

Castiel smiled at Dean’s straightforwardness. Although Castiel had intended to speak more openly about his thoughts regarding Dean’s attractiveness and his wonderful character, he was surprised how fast they had gotten to this point. 

"Sexual intercourse was not strictly consummated, but yes, one could speak of sexual activities. Mostly it was kissing and touching. On top of that, we-“ 

"Woah, Cas,“ Dean yelled, and Castiel could practically see him raising his arms wildly. "Don’t overshare, all right? As much as I like our open conversations, I don’t think I need a mental cinema about you and a woman making out, okay?“ Castiel felt a sting in his gut, but he quickly recovered. His disappointment was not something Dean would gain knowledge of. 

"Yes, I understand. To avoid misunderstandings, you should know it wasn’t a woman.“  
"What the hell! You weren’t interested in sex at all when I first met you, and now you’re having wet dreams about guys.“

"A lot has changed since then, Dean. Is there anything wrong with dreaming about a man?“ he dared to press this topic further.  
Dean sighed, apparently considering his next words. "Naah, of course it ain’t wrong. I guess I was just under the impression you like women, if anyone at all.“

Castiel growled, and answered before he would change his mind. "I told you, strictly speaking, angels do not have a gender as humans know it. But since I have a male vessel I understand your thoughts.“

"Did ya know the guy?“ Dean asked, and Castiel was surprised Dean took interest in this topic after all.

"I couldn’t see him clearly all the time, but I know who he was, yes.“  
Dean swallowed audibly. "Okay, that’s great, I guess. Then you can act on that. To, um, actually get to the kissing part. You want that, don’t ya?“

"More than anything,“ Castiel admitted, feeling his accelerated heartbeat. He was walking a thin line here, with Dean always being able to find out, but he needed to try. Maybe he should find out. "Not only kissing.“

"Yeah, okay, Cas, I get it. You’re horny and you want sex. Awesome for ya. Maybe you should indulge in some quality alone time, let off steam before you- ya know, have sex with the guy. Otherwise, the whole fantastic experience might get ruined a bit.“

"Dean,“ Castiel scolded him. "Don’t reduce my intentions simply to sexual intercourse. Mostly, I am interested in love, not sex. Sex is naturally a welcome side effect.“

"Gotcha,“ Dean said, sounding on edge now, a little hurt maybe. Why was Dean hurt? Castiel didn’t like this sound, he wanted to heal the pain, although it was emotional. "Sorry, didn’t wanna offend you. Maybe I’m not the right guy to ask.“

"Because you like women?“ Castiel asked, feeling horrible once more.

"Um, no, that’s not what I was getting at.“ Dean’s voice sounded scratchy now, yet also smoky, in a way? Castiel couldn’t quite place this new sound in Dean’s voice. "I usually just do one-night stands. But I would change it immediately if that meant finally being with the right person. Um. And to answer your question: I do like women, but not exclusively.“ 

Oh. Castiel had assumed this for a while, but hearing Dean say it out loud made him nervous. What was he supposed to say? Nobody had prepared him for this. "Never told anybody about this, actually. Not even Sammy, although I think he knows anyway,“ Dean added after two minutes of awkward silence.

"Thank you for trusting me with this.“

"Sure. You’re my best friend. I- I miss ya.“ Dean’s voice had become incredibly fragile over the course of his last words. He’d never heard Dean talking with so much tenderness. Except for the times he had almost died, Castiel realized. Castiel’s breathing accelerated, and he really wanted to see Dean right now. "I miss you, too, Dean,“ he replied, although he wanted to say so much more. 

Dean cleared his throat. "Okay, Cas. Ya know what? Tell me about those fantasies. Maybe I can help ya. I mean, that’s what best friends are for.“

Castiel took a deep breath. He had wanted this to happen, but Dean did not know about his feelings and this could become more awkward. Then he just thought about the dream and started talking.

"Like I mentioned I thought about kissing. And I was lost in those thoughts because it felt so wonderful in that dream. Intense and warm, and my whole body tingled. The kiss was passionate, but also tender and soft. And I couldn’t keep my hands still. I had to explore and feel. Our thighs were very much entangled, and we stroked each other everywhere. Then I used my mouth to-“

"Jeez!“ Dean exclaimed immediately. He chuckled, and Castiel could never get enough of this sound. Dean didn’t say anything further, simply breathed. 

Castiel liked listening to his breathing, he always had, especially when watching over him in his sleep. In the beginning, Dean had told him that he had found this behavior weird and creepy, but later on, he had never said anything about it when Castiel had sat on a chair by his side. And sometimes Castiel had imagined Dean actually liked his presence at night. 

"I’m glad Sam’s not here right now, could be a little awkward.“ Dean groaned shortly. "Yeah, Cas. The way you described this, that’s how it’s supposed to feel. Kissing the right person. Anyway, I haven’t experienced that yet. Well, at least I know very hot kisses.“ Dean chuckled once more, so lustily. 

And Castiel felt warm, and he wanted to hear more, he only wanted to listen to Dean’s voice, nothing else. Wanted to tell him anything. Instead, he simply spoke his fears out loud.

"I do not wish to do anything wrong. My feelings overwhelm me, and I am afraid I will be rejected. Furthermore, I am not experienced.“

Dean sighed, and then he clicked his tongue. Castiel imagined him also rubbing his nose because he always did this shortly after. Oh, he really missed Dean. Dean’s breathing was ragged. 

In the background there was a rumbling as if Dean had thrown something across the room. Another loud clash was audible. 

What was Dean doing there? Why was he so frustrated? Perhaps the hunt was exhausting. Castiel should ask him about the hunt again, he hadn’t learned enough details so far. On the other hand, he wanted to hear more about Dean’s thoughts concerning their previous topic, and so he waited, a bit impatiently.

"Cas, I’m sure you’re one hell of a kisser,“ Dean mumbled, inhaling sharply afterwards. "Lemme be real honest for a sec. For me, it would be a major turn-on if the other was still, um, a little inexperienced. Cause that’s the good thing. Everything would be so special, thrilling, and we could explore all the stuff together. And there’s so frigging much to discover, ya know.“

Castiel reflected on Dean’s words for a while. "That sounds wonderful, indeed. Now, I feel somewhat reassured, thank you. Nonetheless, I assume these thoughts will remain hypothetical.“

"You don’t know that, buddy. Believe me, at some point, he’ll notice what he was missing before. I guess, I’m kinda jealous.“ Now, Castiel felt nervous, very nervous. "Why would you be jealous?“ Castiel whispered.

Dean cursed something which unfortunately was not audible.  
"Because you’d have what I yea- what I wish for. A serious relationship.“ 

Castiel swallowed. He had not expected Dean to be so open about his feelings and wishes, it was unusual for him. What had changed? Still, Castiel saw no indication Dean meant those words directed at him.

"I still don’t believe this will actually happen. He is not aware of my feelings at all,“ he admitted, feeling sad all of a sudden. "And he probably never saw me this way. He has many admirers, mostly women.“ 

A loud clunk, then a hiss. Castiel needed to know what was going on. "Mm, shit, that’s too bad, but hey, this is his loss, man, if you ask me. Definitely.“ 

Castiel smiled broadly, not able to suppress his happiness any longer.  
"Thank you, Dean,“ he replied, smiling even more now. "You are kind as always. It helped to talk so openly with you today.“

Dean laughed. "Yeah. Not sure it’s still me we’re talking about, but glad I could cheer you up a bit.“  
“Good night, Dean.“  
"Night, Cas,“ Dean answered, stressing his name so sweetly Castiel’s heart ached. 

***

A few days later Dean and Sam came back to the bunker, and somehow everything was different. They spent time together, but Dean behaved weirdly, was even more silent about his inner state than usual. 

Castiel tried to talk to him more than once, but Dean always shut him off. Angrily. Sam told him that nothing had happened on the hunt whereupon Castiel drew the conclusion Dean was specifically angry with him. 

Then, Sam sighed and muttered something along the lines he suspected Dean suffered from emotions. Maybe, Dean had found out Castiel loved him, and now he could not stand him anymore.

He had to talk to Dean, he could not lose their friendship. 

Urgently, he knocked at Dean’s door.

"Leave me alone, Sammy!“ Dean yelled, sounding hoarse. Very hoarse. Had he been crying? No, that was not possible.  
"It’s me – Castiel,“ he said quietly. "Can I come in?“

"No, definitely not!“ Dean barked.  
"Dean!“ he pleaded, ignoring the confusion and sadness and yearning he felt.  
"Not the best time, Cas. I frigging mean it. Just go.“ 

Why did Dean always irritate him so much? It was frustrating. And so he hammered against the door, again and again until he heard a loud hiss. 

"I swear to god, Cas!“ Dean yelled. Castiel heard loud steps, vibrating on the floor, then the door was ripped open. 

Dean stood before him, only wearing loose hanging sweatpants and a black T-shirt, and his expression was full of rage – and hurt. His eyes were puffy and red, and Castiel was dumb-struck.

"Whaddaya want?“ Dean demanded, folding his arms in front of his chest.

"Talk to you.“  
"Not in the mood.“ Dean’s eyes were glittering, the moistness still stuck there. His chest was rising and falling. Rising and falling. Rising and falling. 

"I don’t understand why you are so angry,“ Castiel said and stared at Dean, fixating him and drowning in his eyes like always. Dean continued to watch his face. 

"It’s none of your business, buddy.“ There it was again. This harshness Castiel abhorred. He knew Dean was lying, that his whole demeanor was a facade, but it still hurt and angered him. 

"Oh, I think it is my business since I am the person you’re angry at,“ Castiel stated, and Dean rolled his eyes. This attitude annoyed Castiel, very much so, since he didn’t understand it. 

"Whatever.“ Dean made a step back, almost as if retreating, his hands on the door knob. 

"Dean,“ Castiel pleaded, putting a hand on his shoulder, a gesture which normally seemed to calm Dean down, he had learned. After a few seconds, Dean turned around, looking at him intensely, his eyes flickered over his face. Up and down, up and down. Frantically. 

Dean growled so loudly that Castiel’s body shivered. Suddenly, he was pushed against the wall. Dean pressed his body into his, roughly, but not violently, until his legs touched his and his arms were placed on the wall beside his head. Dean smelled good. His scent was a mixture between freshly showered, leather, pine and something very Dean-like. 

Castiel got goosebumps, swallowed and concentrated on the sight of these freckles he could never get enough of. Eventually, his eyes darted to Dean’s luscious lips which looked so tempting. He enjoyed the closeness, leaned closer into Dean’s body while Dean only pressed harder, finally grinding on him, but still not saying a single word. 

Dean inhaled and exhaled deeply, and looked at him, with so much despair and hunger.

"Cas, I-“ Dean interrupted himself and paused. Taking another deep breath, he finally shook his head. And then Dean kissed him. Hard and demandingly. 

Dean’s anger was tangible in his kiss, and Castiel moved his lips against his, never having felt so shaken up in his entire existence. Dean kissed him. He kissed him. It felt so much better than in his dream. 

His lips were particularly soft and tasted wonderful, and Castiel felt a tingle which suddenly flooded all of his body. Dean pressed himself harder to him, moaning now. His hands gripped his trench coat, clinging onto him like to a rope hanging over an abyss. 

"Nobody’s like you, and that’s so good. Ya hear me? So fucking good,“ Dean breathed against his lips, inhaling loudly.  
"Castiel.“ Dean had groaned while saying the last word, and Castiel’s mind spurred. Castiel felt overwhelmed by the way Dean had pronounced his full name, and could not think anymore. He was responsible for these sounds. 

Dean kissed him once more, nibbling at his lips. In alternation, he used his teeth a little, then licked the spot immediately after. Then his tongue gently demanded entrance which Castiel cheerfully granted. Their tongues found a rhythm. Wild, yet sensual. Dean really was skillful at kissing, Castiel quickly thought before returning the kiss more feverishly. 

While doing so, he moved his hands over Dean’s chest, his arms, his sides and then his back. Dean moaned into his mouth causing the sweetest sensations in him. Due to the lack of his usual many layers of clothes, Castiel clearly felt Dean’s arousal.

"Your character,“ Dean murmured while kissing alongside his neck. From time to time, he let his nose wander, apparently attempting to caress every inch. 

Dean hummed against Castiel’s skin, sometimes interrupted himself by chuckling softly, his breath warm and marvelous.

"Mm,“ Castiel replied nonsensically for the kisses distracted him a lot, and he could not get enough of Dean’s lips and the delicious sounds he made.  
"What about it?“ he managed to ask Dean at last. 

Dean stopped himself, looking at him with the most intense expression Castiel had ever seen on him. And that was saying a lot. 

"Your most attractive feature. It’s your frigging character, all right?“ Dean quickly averted his eyes, clicking his tongue as if being annoyed at himself for saying this wonderful remark. 

"Crap,“ Dean said and rubbed the back of his neck. He looked at the ceiling now, muttering "Crap!“ over and over. 

"What’s wrong, Dean?“ he asked silently.

Dean huffed. "Am angry at myself, okay? Not you. I hate this. Dammit, you’re the jackpot, man. Fucking hate myself for not telling you sooner. Not telling you at all, actually.“ 

Dean looked at him again, his whole body shaking. "But I thought you knew. You gotta know that I l- how you make me feel. How happy and diff- You- this felt so fantastic. But with this stupid other guy. This sucks ass. What the hell was I thinking?“ 

He looked bewildered and lost, Castiel had never seen him struggling so hard with his words. 

And now Castiel understood. 

"Dean,“ he said with urgency, trying to calm his trembling voice. "It was you. The man in the dream. It’s always been you for me. Only you.“ 

Dean’s mouth opened and closed again. He swallowed and narrowed his eyes, making a frustrated sound. "Son of a bitch. You gotta be kidding me, man.“

Without a warning Dean crashed his mouth onto his, claiming him, immediately licking Castiel’s lips. One arm was wrapped around Castiel’s waist, and Dean pressed himself into him so urgently there was no space left between them anymore. 

Castiel sighed, the sound quickly turning into a groan, and then he returned the kiss, moving his hands over Dean’s upper body until they came to rest in Dean’s neck. Dean hummed softly when Castiel touched him there which caused him to kiss Dean even more deeply. 

They kissed and kissed, and Castiel didn’t know where he was anymore. Subconsciously, he noticed Dean was moving them, kissing him while also kicking the door wide open. Dean removed his trench coat in a matter of seconds, then put his arms around waist again.

"You’re fucking unbelievable,“ Dean mumbled while grinning against his lips. Castiel didn’t know whether Dean was cursing or complimenting him but at this moment he frankly did not care. 

"Ditto,“ Castiel muttered indignantly, but also adoringly whereupon Dean chuckled lustily. This perfect sound buzzed in the air, flying directly into Castiel and warming him from the inside. 

Meanwhile, Dean had pushed him further into the room, now tossing him gently onto the bed while shifting his weight onto him. Dean propped himself up on his elbows, and cradled Castiel’s face with his hands, finally only stroking his cheek with his thumb. 

Dean smiled softly, and Castiel’s heart fluttered like his wings had used to do. 

With the dim light in the room, Dean’s eyes were even more stunning than usual. At this moment, their color reminded Castiel of emerald vine, one of the rarest and most beautiful flowers on earth. The first time he had seen these plants in reality, he had been dumfounded.

Looking into Dean’s eyes, however, made him feel this exact way every single time, but even more mesmerized. So much more. Castiel smiled. 

This was Dean in front and on top of him, more beautiful than ever. 

"So, dream coming to life, huh?“ Dean asked and nudged his nose with his. Then he started kissing his neck again, tickling him with his stubble.  
"No,“ Castiel replied with a tiny smile. 

Dean froze, immediately backing away from him. He observed Castiel’s face with a mixture between hurt and anger. 

Castiel leaned closer to Dean, smiling at him before kissing him tenderly. "I prefer the real you. Still, I am eager to learn.“

Dean smirked wickedly and winked at him. "Well, in that case. Lemme show you all the good stuff. There’s so much I have imagined about you. Us.“

Dean kissed him so sensually, with so much tenderness, savoring his lips, cherishing them while also moving above him. 

"The mattress remembers me, ya know,“ Dean breathed and started sucking his lips. "Suppose it’ll remember you as well in the future.“ 

Castiel felt warm at that single sentence, the word "future", in particular. He pressed himself more eagerly against Dean, enclosing Dean’s lower body with his legs. 

And then they explored each other. Slowly, without haste. Because now they didn’t let the time pass, instead, they used it in their favor. 

Later at night, Dean pulled him onto his chest, tousling his hair, kissing his temple once in a while. Castiel had entangled his legs with Dean’s, feeling utterly content.

He felt Dean’s chest rising and falling faster now, his breath coming out more raggedly. Dean drew in air and swallowed audibly, numerous times, until he cleared his throat. 

"I- I love you, Cas. So frigging much,“ he whispered into the quiet, voice husky. 

Dean inhaled again, his body shaking beneath Castiel. 

He heard the beating of Dean’s heart, the heart which Dean had gifted to him – Castiel. 

Dean had stripped himself bare with his words, had made himself vulnerable. This purity reminded Castiel of the day he had gripped his soul out of hell. He had seen the beauty of Dean’s soul and had never been the same since. Moreover, Castiel had gotten to known his mannerisms, his quirks, him even better over the years. 

Castiel had learned to think for himself. He had learned how to feel. He had learned all of this because of Dean. 

This wonderful man who considered himself broken beyond repair had completed him. And yes, he would not change his new life for the world. 

This exact place, laying in Dean’s arms, was a new kind of heaven. 

Dean for whom he had rebelled and fallen from heaven, his former home, had given him a new home. 

The most extraordinary and exciting and fulfilling and meaningful home. The place where he truly belonged. Dean had given him the best home. He had given Castiel himself.

"I love you, too, Dean,“ he whispered back with as much sincerity he could muster. "All of you.“

**Author's Note:**

> I'm @dean-and-cas-at-the-sea on Tumblr. :)
> 
> Thank you for reading! Please let me know what you think. :)


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